Sadness

I realize that I haven't posted in a month and a half; things have been a little crazy at our house.  After we got back from Disney World (which I hope to write about later), one of us was sick after the other, and in any spare moments I've been trying to get the boys' playroom done so that they have a place of their own to play, rather than in the middle of the living room.  All that, plus holiday prep, means things like blogging have fallen to the end of the list.  Now, though, I'm sitting in a doctor's waiting room undergoing fructose sensitivity testing.  Basically, I've had to drink a really awful, sweet solution and they then have me breathe into a machine every 30 minutes for 2 hours to see if I have a fructose sensitivity.  Fun times, let me tell you.  But since I'm a captive audience, I thought I'd get back on the blogging train.  Before I start back with general blogging though, I wanted to say a few words about the Newtown tragedy (or as many as I can before I start sobbing in front of all these people).

I honestly don't know what to say.  Every time I think about those babies with their lives cut short, I'm heartbroken.  How do you write an obituary for a six- or seven-year-old?  And then how do you write nineteen more?  The funerals and services begin today, and my heart aches for the parents and families and friends.  The other night, I was up with James in the middle of the night for over an hour trying to get him back to sleep.  I was annoyed and tired, but then I thought, you know, there are twenty families who would give anything to be awake with their babies.  Anything for a crying child in the middle of the night.  Twenty families who may be awake, because they are so overcome with grief that they can't sleep.  And then the countless other families who are awake with children who can't sleep because they're terrified, terrified because they saw or heard their friends and teachers get gunned down in a place that was supposed to be a safe haven.  I don't know what the answer is.  I know that it is important that we have this conversation now.  Don't put it off, and say it's too soon.  Soon it will be too late.  I've seen people commenting that it isn't all about guns; it's about access to mental health care, too.  This is certainly true; we need to have quality mental health care available to anyone who needs it.  But I think people jump to guns because there's no way we can ever help all the people who need mental health care.  There's no way to track everyone down, and no real way to force those who need help to take it if they don't want it.  And because of that, I think people look to something that can be legislated, and that's gun control.  Living in Texas, I don't know that banning handguns would work.  I know that several countries have done that, but I wonder what their rate of gun ownership was beforehand.  As I said, I don't know what the answer is.  There probably isn't one single answer.  But we have to do something.  No parent should ever have to bury her child.  No child should ever see his best friend gunned down, or hear his favorite teacher die defending his life.  This has to stop.